| Why not? |
[30 Aug 2005|07:06pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 bored |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Used // Box of Sharp Objects |
] |
Well, a lot has happened since my last update.
I started school, for one. I'm finally in my senior year and I love all
my classes. I got Psychology and Anatomy, which are the two I really
wanted. I got Spanish without Kotzan which makes me praise the good
lord.
Nesa, Ben and L are talking with me and Dubs again. That makes me pretty damn happy. I apologized for a lot and still will.
Dubs and me are still going strong. I love him to death. :-*
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| Expectations... |
[30 Jul 2005|08:04pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 amused |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Television // SVU |
] |
A lot has changed, actually. I got kicked out my mother's house for
...well...supposedly stealing stuff. I'm sure a few certain people know
exactly what I'm talking about..you stupid fucks. I'll let you know
one..fucking...thing. Revenge has a time and place. And when it comes
time to get your revenge, you'll be on your god-forsaken knees praying
to the heavens above that you never see my face again.
Then again, you won't see my face coming....just wait. You'll have yours...
I know feel like the goddamn Punisher with this shit. Ooohh, how I want
my revenge. I hate you. I never thought I could ever hate person(s)
like I do now. However, me and Dubs are getting an apartment together.
Thank god I did what I did and said what I said..or else...I'd still
have stupid fucks trailing my ass.
Just remember...
Sic vis pacum, bara pellum
(if you want peace, prepare for war)
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[28 Jun 2005|01:49pm] |
You are
[ ] tall
[ ] in between
[x ] short
[ ] blonde
[ ] redhead
[x] brunette
[ ] dirty blonde
[x] black
[ ]blue-eyed
[ ] brown-eyed
[ ] green-eyed
[ x] hazel eyed
[ ] gold/gray eyed
[ x] glasses
[ ] contacts
[ ] braces
[ ] freckles
[ ] piercings (not yet)
[ ] tatoos (not yet)
[ ] long hair
[] short hair
[x ] med. Hair
Your nationality includes...
[ ] chinese
[ ] indian
[ ] taiwanese
[ ] japanese
[ x] hispanic
[ ] nicoya
[ ] puerto rican
[ ] chicana
[] italian
[ ] scottish
[ ] filipino
[ ] armenian
[ ] dutch
[] french
[] german
[] irish
[ ] greek
[ ] portugeese
[ ] polish
[ ] korean
[ ] jamacian
[ ] canadian
[ ] lithuanian
[x] Native American
[ ] Russian
[] British
[ ] African
[x] spanish
[ ] hungarian
Your favorite color(s) are?
[x ] red
[ ] pink
[ ] yellow
[x] black
[x] green
[] blue
[ ] white
[ x] silver
[ ] purple
[ ] brown
[ ] orange
Some sports/physical things you have done seriously?
[ ] soccer
[ ] cheerleading
[x ] dancing
[ ] lacrosse
[ ] field hockey
[ ] hockey
[ ] football
[ x] softball
[ ] wrestling
[ ] gymnastics
[ ] track/cross country
[ ] Basketball
[ ] baseball
[ ] golf
[x] playing in the mud
[ ] playing music
[ ] hiking
[ ] track
[ ] kayaking
[ ] camping
[ ] horseback riding
[ ] tennis
Your personality is sometimes...
[x] annoying
[ ] talkative
[x] shy
[x] funny
[x] serious
[x ] bubbly
[x] spazzy
[ ] fun loving
[x] laid back
[ ] strict
[x] hyper
[x] weird
The music you like is?
[ x]rap.
[x]rock
[ ] pop
[ ]country.
[ x] hiphop
[ x] r&b
[ ] slow jams
[ ] Christian.
[ ] classical
[] techno
[ ] oldies
[x] punk
[x] metal
[ x] reggae
[] Goth
[ ] Latin.
[] hardcore
[ ] ska
The pets you have had?
[x] cat
[x] dog
[ x] lizard
[ ] rat
[ ] ferret
[ ]rabbit
[x] fish
[ ] ducks
[ ]chickens
[ ] horse
[ x] goats
Clothes you like to wear are?
[x] plain tshirts
[ ] sweatshirts
[ ] stockings
[ x] Boots
[x] sneakers
[x] jeans
[ ] pj pants
[] boxers
[x] underwear
[ ] dresses
[x ] mini skirts
[ x] long skirts
[ ] watches
[ ] hoop earring(s)
[ ] toe socks
[ x] flip flops
[ ] halter tops
[ ] stilletos
[x] band shirts
[ ] shorts
How do you like to wear your hair?
[ x] down
[ x] ponytail
[ ] pigtails
[ x] messy bun
[ ] half ponytail
[ x] scrunched/curly
[ ] bun
[ ] crimped
[ ] with a bandana
[ ] French braids
[ ] lots of little braids
[] Gel
[x ] Beanies
[ ] messy hot guy hair!!!!
[ ] Fohawk!!! Kinda like a Mohawk!!! STFU.
You're mostly labeled as?
[ ] goth
[x ] emo
[ ] prep
[ ] punk
[ ] hippie
[ ] nerd
[ ] ditzy
[] hyper
[ ] happy
[ ] everything
[] I hate labels
[x] i have no idea
You eat?
[x] dessert every night
[ ] no meat
[ ] diet stuff
[ ] healthy foods
[x] junk foods
[x]a lot of carbs
[x] meat
[ ] salad
[] seafood
A typical friday night...
[ ] malll with friends
[ x]partying
[x ] watching movies
[ ] going to the club
[ ] staying home
[ ] babysitting and getting $$
[ x] hanging out w/ my friends
[ x] hanging out w/ your boyfriend/girlfriend
[] working while your friends are out having fun! :(
Currently you are...
[x]in a relationship
[ ] single and lovin it
[ ]crushing
[ ] single and looking for someone
[ ] just broke up. . . and so sad about it.
Online, you use:
[x] lol
[ ] sup
[x ] =D
[ ] lmao
[ ] stfu
[ ] ty
[] jk
[ ] ttyl
[ ] lylas/lylab
[] g2g
[x ] ^^
[ ] T_T
Did you like this survey?
[ ] TOTALLY!!!!
[ ] no!
[ ] it was ok
[x] it was something to do
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| New layout and love |
[17 Jun 2005|09:26pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Bonnie and Clyde // Jay-Z |
] |
I suppose what I come to think of most is simply my boyfriend. Maybe it's puppy love.
Maybe it's not. We talk about it a lot but it's always scary to think
that something this fucking great might disappear someday. I can
honestly say I don't think I've ever been this happy. And then, of all
fucking things, the people that are most important in life, don't even
seem to care that I'm this happy. That I've actually found something so
good that I can't get enough of it. Five months ago? Where was I? Sad.
Wallowing in my self pity because I had nothing better. I had nothing
that I thought was going to be there forever. Five months ago, I was
considering moving to North Carolina with my Daddy. And now look at
me...I'm planning my fucking future because I love where I'm at. I love
who I'm with and I love what I'm doing with my life. I just don't
understand how people, that say they love me and say they are my best
friends, can just waft off something so fucking special. I'm not upset
because I came to the conclusion that it's because they've never
expierenced it. Something like this. And that's what brings me to think
sometimes that it's simply puppy love and if that's what this is..I
don't think my heart can take a real love.
Which gives me my final conclusion...this isn't just puppy love and my heart still can't take it. I feel like my heart is going to explode and stop beating at the same time when I'm with him. Like I'm complete. I feel like I'm doing something so right yet so wrong all in one. And I love this love.
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who'll lay under the stars and listen to your heart beat or will stay awake to watch you sleep. Wait for the boy who kisses you on your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world in your sweats, who will hold your hand in front of his friends, who thinks your just as pretty without makeup, one whos constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you...I've found him.
1
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[29 May 2005|06:01pm] |
|
So, here I am again. Not much has changed as I say in every single entry that I come to make.
It's almost my birfday!!!! I'll be seventeen on the second of June! All are welcome to send gifts to 420 Mary Jane Lane. ...Just kidding. Anywho. Everything is going pretty damned good. Dubbers is buying me a puppy for my birthday. I love him. <3 Yes, we're still together and still doing good. The Crypts are still cryptin' it up, as usual. We went out to the Rock the other day, it was great. Me gusta la coca!! =) Well, I'm at Dub's house and I don't want to be on the computer all day.
JS people(<3)..I have a new number, feel free to call me...whenever you'd like.
5357542...Same area code as before.
1
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[05 May 2005|07:13am] |
So, I haven't updated in many a days. Reason being that I'm not by a
computer enough to do so. I live with my momma now, whom doesn't have a
computer. And, normally, I'm pretty busy to be running back and forth
between Jan's and my mom's. But when Jan is gone, I stop down in the
morning and feed the cats, which means I can stop by the computer to
see what's up with everything. Looks like much hasn't changed, which
doesn't surprise me.
Everything in life is going pretty damn good. Me and Dubs are going
strong. It'll be two whole months on the 20th. It seems like a lot
longer than that, but I love every minute of it. The Crypts are doing
okay. We don't hang out as much as we used to, which means we don't
hang out every single day anymore.
Well, I have to go catch my bus for gay-fucking-school.
Much love
1
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[21 Apr 2005|03:22pm] |
Not much has been happening. I'm completely moved in with my mother,
once again. It's been going pretty damn well as of late. The boys are
doing fine and Nesa is her same old self. Me and Dubs are going strong.
Yesterday was our one month anniversary. Quite proud that we made it
this far(through the first hump...bouf)
Well, school is almost done. Thank god. Only 29 more days. I'm counting done like a son of a bitch.
It's been kind of dry but we're doing alright.
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[14 Apr 2005|07:07am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Green Day // Wake Me Up When September Ends |
] |
So much has been going on. I'm moving back into my mom's. Today I'm going to start packing to start moving all my crap up there.
There was a big fight but now it's all better, thank god.
I don't feel like typing in here that much anymore. I'm tired. It's seven in the morning and I can't wait to get through school because of the four day weekend I have waiting for me.
Me and Dubs are doing pretty damn good. =) Can't complain about much.
Summertime...and the living's easy.
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| Fucking irritating |
[05 Apr 2005|10:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 irritated |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Can I Get A // Jay-Z |
] |
I'm going to shoot myself. My fucking computer is annoying as fuck and doing the shit I did today isn't fucking helpin'.
Other than that, nothing is new. Nothing changed. Everything is the same fucking thing as before.
The Crypts are doing fine. Dubs and me are doing fine.
Going now.
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| Hypnotize |
[28 Mar 2005|09:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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sleepy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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B.I.G // Hypnotize |
] |
I'm pretty tired and ready for bed. It was a long day. Ben got into a
wreck, one car and he walked from it. But we were waiting to meet him
and he wasn't showing up, so we called his phone and he said he wrecked
into a phonepole. Our hearts just dropped. We drove to the hospital and
saw him. It was so crazy. He's gunnae be in a lot of trouble and what
not.
I'm moving back in with my mother. So I might not be on the computer
that much. It doesn't matter that much to me, I just have to use it
now-a-days for school stuff and updates. I'm not home too much, usually
always out with my friends.
Anywho, I'm extremely tired. <3
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| Started out with a kiss |
[24 Mar 2005|07:13am] |
| [ |
mood |
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tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Nothing |
] |
So, I don't update that much anymore. Mainly because I'm never really
home. I'm so tired, it's unbelievable. Like, I feel that if I lay
ANYWHERE, I'll pass out and won't wake up for a good few hours.
Yesterday was spent with Dub for a bit, met his mom for the second
time, his brother and who not. It was nice to spend sometime alone,
like just us. Everything is going pretty good. Seems like we're riding
the gravytrain... And then we went with L. We went to my mom's house
and hung out there. That was really all we did.
I have to go to school, but today is the last day before Easter break.
Which, in all reality, is only Friday and Monday, stupid bastards.
Either way, it's time off and it likes time off so it's welcoming the
break.
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| Let's Go |
[20 Mar 2005|11:01pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 loved |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Trick Daddy // Let's Go |
] |
So, everything is all gravy. Today has been kind of rocky but it's fine
now. Me and Dub are official, which makes me smile. But that's
typically what happens with an emo girl like me. I'm really considering
moving back in with my mother. I figured it'd be so much easier and I
don't have to worry about a lot. And, I can make sure the kids are
doing fine plus Nesa or Ben or Dub can come and get me if I need it. I
have to talk to my sister about it but other than that, I'm fine..
I have a speech to give tomorrow. I think I'm good. I think.
Other than that. I'm dating Dub. And I just giggled. OooooHoo, I'm such a loser. <3
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| Dress Now |
[20 Mar 2005|12:17am] |
| [ |
mood |
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sleepy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Killers // Mr. Brightside |
] |
The past couple days have been great. So much has been going on. I don't really feel like typing because we have chimmychongas and cheese dip. Plus, we've had a reaallllllllllllyyyyy long day. But fun. But that's what happens when you have the Crypts. <3 And Ross.
Night
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[16 Mar 2005|11:11pm] |
Today was Dub's birthday. I had a lot of fun. There's still some drama going on, mainly confusing about so much.
Nesa said it's fine and I wouldn't mind doing it but she thinks it's a bad idea if I get a boyfriend-in or out of the Crypts.
Either way, I'm tired
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| Get out |
[14 Mar 2005|11:42pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
Emo |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Sublime // Santeria |
] |
There's so much going on. I really don't think I can take it anymore. I
feel pretty crappy and Nesa said I shouldn't but I do, more than ever
before.
I have such bad self-esteem that it prevents me from believing so much.
I'm not pretty. I'm not talented. I'm not anything but what I think I
am and its hard for people to change that. There are days when I'm so
confident and shit, it's crazy. I think I'm bipolar.
And then there is this whole situation and I want to tell someone so
bad but it's like...I'll fuck so much shit up. More than it is. I feel
so...ugh, I don't even know. I want to talk about it. I hate keeping
things in, it's not who I am. God, why does this happen?
I need my emo boy. He's the only one who knows how I feel. <3
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| Shake |
[13 Mar 2005|07:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 high |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Disco Inferno // 50 Cent |
] |
So, the weekend has been decent. Friday was a okay night. We were all
supposed to chill and Dub's had to go home. We planned it out to be
like his birthday thing, cause his birthday is on a weekday. Anywho, it
was okay. We all passed out. Saturday was fantastic. Ben had to babysit
and we all went up there for a while before coming here. It was an
amazing time. Loads of funness.
Last night was kind of crazy. I figured why wait around. I'm not going
to be someone's sloppy seconds. It's a hard situation. I don't want to
sound like a school girl or anything of the sort but part of me likes
Dub. It's a weird thing. Craziness in my head but it's all good. I'm
used to that.
|
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| Staying up |
[12 Mar 2005|01:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Yellowcard // Ocean's Avenue |
] |
I defriended my journal. I found that it was pointless. Mainly because
everything I put in it I don't mind people knowing. And if it's
something insane, it goes on Friends only but otherwise, why go through
the trouble?
Last night was decently fun. Ben passed out. And then the rest of us
did. Other than that, it was a typical night. We all got smiley faces.
Nesa's didn't turn out very good and mine isn't going to stay for too
long. I'm not sure about Dub's but Ben and L's are real nice.
Something is supposed to go down tonight but like usual shit is
probably going to get fucked up. I'm not pessismistic but I'm just so
used to it happening that it's like it's nothing anymore, so whatever.
It'd be fun if we would plan things out and they'd actually come to
work, but they never do.
Mmm, no new news. Of course. I found this really cool design for a prom
dress but I'm not sure if it's worthy of making. It's odd. What if I
find a good design, get it made and then end up HATING it? I'm fucked
up the asshole. However, I'll weigh out my options. I'm not even sure
I'm going to prom. I mean, I want to. But I don't know. More than
likely, I'll go..
|
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| Right thurr |
[11 Mar 2005|07:26am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sick |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Chingy // Right Thurr |
] |
Last night we hung out with Ben, L and Dub. It was pretty fun. At times, I feel like I make Dub feel uncomfortable, just in general. But L said that's sort of just how he is. Quiet and what not. He sort of reminds me of a Tyler, in a way. Tonight we're hanging out again. Nesa has to work until 8 but Dub and L are coming down after school and then Nesa said Ben will be around 7ish. Katie might be chillin' with us. Someone's getting us a few presents but we're unsure of how much. It'll be fun, I think it will be.
And I've decided that I'm not going to wait around anymore. I'm not going to hold myself back from anything because I want this specific thing. I'm here for the taking.
Can't wait to be disappointed
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[10 Mar 2005|08:54pm] |
LJ Friends Meme by ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) coolerq• You must tell 5 people about this game.
• L is the one that you love.
• Dub is one you like but can't work out.
• You care most about Nesa.
• Ben is the one who knows you very well.
• Nicky is your lucky star.
• Mr Bright Side is the song that matches with L.
• Lover I don't have to Love is the song for Dub.
• 12 Step is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind.
• and Santeria is the song telling you how you feel about life
Take this quiz
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